Come Again?

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There were 3 options:
1 - WHITE: fatty tissue. No worries. No removal. No complications.
2 - BLACK: cancerous cells. Malignant cancer. Surgery immediately. Pray to God it's no where else.
3 - GRAY: inconclusive. It could be malignant. It could be benign. All we know is it's NOT #1.

#2 and 3 mean surgery no matter what.
And of course, after the longest 5? 10? 80?! minutes of my life... results = GRAY

There's either too many white blood cells or too much blood mixed in the fluid to say for sure. The next step would be a biopsy. BUT... since we know it's not #1, the best course of action is to just have it removed and have the whole tumor sent to pathology.

Obviously, we can't do that here; we're preparing travel for Sunday. The good news, it can all happen in the states (with well trusted/known vets).

On top of this, neither more or less important (how can one justify concern over a human vs. a dog ~ am I a horrible sister? Person?)...
Jamie is having a blood transfusion TODAY w/CT scans tomorrow to make sure the cancer has not spread before his surgery on Monday. The current cancer is the size of a baseball in his small bowels. The docs have assured us that the surgery will make him feel 100% better but ultimately will not cure the cancer.

My life, my families lives... all in a whirlwind of what needs to happen first. Where we need to be; what we need to make happen... planning, questioning, and honestly, just feeling too much.

Guys, thank you for the support. I've had a huge outreach of support and I can't thank you enough. Remember I use to write all the time? Keep you guys updated, entertained, or thinking outside the box? (or maybe just annoyed, ha ha!!). But do you remember the time when I was able to express the good bad and ugly? Just be me?

This AA case has fucked up my life. Fucked up my ability to be me; to express how I feel to my world. Not to mention sparked a fear of flying with Jake. It's a sad shame. Boils my blood.
And all I want is for it to be OVER. Depositions bring me one step closer to that. But if it comes down to delaying this vs. the treatment of my lovey, I will pick Jake EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. And to damn with anything else.